[Cepat2 type sebelum si kecik bangun]
I would like to share my excruciating experience of labour:
On 21st June 2009 (Ain dear, Lana did try to come out on your birthday!), at about 10.30pm I started to feel a different kind of pain that I can only describe as indescribable pain since I didn’t know how real contraction feels like. Now I know. The first time I felt it, I wasn’t sure what it was. It happened in a few seconds so I resumed watching TV with Muq (I didn’t remember what we were watching la Sayang.. Was it Friends?). At 11pm, I felt another contraction. By this time, I have started to think “Is this IT?”. But I was still unsure. Then the contractions came every 15 minutes apart. The clueless husband of mine told me to go to bed by around 11.30pm. I did try to sleep but with the 15 mins apart contractions, sleeping was impossible. While Muq was snoring away in the dreamland, I was tossing and turning and in between swaying my hip and walking around the room. Around 2am, I started looking for the notes I printed (about labour process). I was unsure whether it was time to go to the hospital since my ob & gyn told me to wait for the bloody show or water break. By then, I my contractions were 5 mins apart. By 2.30am, I got up, changed clothes and wake Muq up. It’s time. By 2.45am, we were out of the house on our 10 minutes drive to Hospital An-Nur.
Upon arrival, I was taken to the labour room. The nurses kept asking me, “Ada apa-apa tanda? Darah atau air?” and I kept answering “No. Takde ape-ape. Tapi saya sakit already. 5 mins contractions”. One of the nurses attached a device for measuring contractions on my tummy and she checked for dilation. I was 1cm dilated. When Muq joined me, we heard the next door lady giving birth. She was not actually yelling or shouting, but she was reapeating “Allahuakbar!” non-stop and was whimpering in pain. The still and silent night actually enhanced her voice and we can hear clearly. I had tears in my eyes, as I felt how painful it was (plus the contractions some more). Both of us were silent, listening to the agonizing woman giving birth. Then, after the second dilation check up, I was send to the ward as I was only (still) 1cm dilated.
My dearest husband was with me all the time. Except for the few minutes of him going off for Subuh prayer and getting drinks and popping up paracetamol. Sleeping was out of the questions as my contractions get closer, but the nurses kept telling us that I was only 1cm dilated. Imagine suffering for 7 hours - 5mins contractions with 1cm dilation. Oh, by the way, contractions are like 10x period pain + 10x back ache. It started at the back, moving its way to the uterus. Even though it happens in under 60 seconds, its the longest 60 seconds ever. I was given enema to empty the bladder (amazing what drugs can do! haha). Gone was all the food I ate the night before.
At 9.30am, Dr. Kamsiah came (finally). She ordered the nurse to attach the contraction-counting device and she checked for the dilation. Then she said the magic words, “Induce”. I needed to be induced as it took so long for me to dilate and both baby and me were pretty tired by that time. I was induced right after that and by 10am, the dilation grew to 5cm. Dr. Kamsiah told me that it was time to go to the labour room, but a nurse then came and told us that we have to wait since all the labour room were being used. So we waited for a couple of hours, and by this time, I was clinging to Muq, signaling him for a back rub everytime the contraction came. Oh, the pain was greater! I noticed that I felt extremely thirsty so I kept asking for water. (Heard that dying people would feel thirsty. I guess, that’s how it feels, dying).
Around noon or somewhat after that ( I lost sense of time as the contractions were closer and more painful), I was taken to the labour room. This time around, I felt the worst pain ever. No word can describe the pain mothers go through. Although it really helps having Muq with me to rub my back, giving me water and offering me his arms to cling to. Amidst the excruciating pain, I heard Muq asking me if I want to take Epidural. Tips to first time father-to-be, NEVER ASK YOUR WIFE TO DECIDE when she is in labour. We (or rather Muq and the nurse) were on the verge of agreeing on epi when the nurse told us that there is another drug, cost lesser but it only takes out 30% of the pain. So, we decided on that. With it, the pain went back to as the earlier contractions - more bearable. And I was so dazed!
As I was only 8cm dilated, the nurse kept telling me not to push, yet, since the baby’s head is still a finger-length away from the canal. She had to insert the cathether to clear my bladder since I was sipping too much water. It turned out that my bladder was full and that prevented the baby from moving out of the canal. She said that I have to tell her when I can no longer hold myself from pushing, and as she was saying that, I can no longer hold it. I told Muq that I can’t take it anymore and he went off calling the nurses. That’s when Dr. Kamsiah came in and told me to push. And so the pushing began. It took me 2 very long push to get the baby out. Oh, the thing I heard about the snip snip down there, well.. I didn’t feel a thing (but I did notice the doctor’s movement of doing it)!. Thank God, maybe because the labour itself was painful enough to block any other pain. Then, I heard the voices around me saying “Pandai dia teran.” “Bagus”. “Dah nampak dah kepala baby”. “Meh ayah nak tengok tak?”. “Nak amek gambar tak?”. “Ayah nak potong tali pusat?”. Bla bla bla ( can’t remember dah). Lana was put on my lap and I looked at her (seeing blur, as I didn’t have my glasses on), touched her but I wasn’t sure of my expression at that moment (was I smiling? any tears?). And the last thing I heard was Dr. Kamsiah telling me that she was going to put me to sleep before sewing me up. A nurse inserted the needle and for the first time in my life, I passed out and lost some time in nothingness land.
When I woke up, Muq was beside me. He smiled and I knew everything was OK. I was still groggy and in dazed. We have to wait for some time since there was no wheelchair available. I don’t mind the wait this time. I can’t actually remember my conversation with Muq at that time, but I would like to think of it as one of the best moments I have with him.
Back in the room, which I was supposed to get some rest - I didn’t get any. Turned out that the lady we heard giving birth earlier that day was sharing the room with us. That was not so bad. The worst thing was, she had her first child who was ever so excited with high-pitch voice with her. The boy was clever, no doubt, reciting Al-Fatihah, Azan and talking non-stop, but it became so annoying since I really need the rest and I can’t even shut my eye for a moment! I was really sleepy and groggy and tired.. When I was on the verge of slipping into dreamland, the boy shrieks dragged me back to the room - and I swore, next time I give birth, I’d like a single room. No matter what.
Thank you to friends and family who visited me. Later that day, my family arrived (plus the extended ones - Mak Num, Pak Be, my cousin Jah who was counting days to her wedding, Cu and her children who were just arrived from Turkmenistan). Then, my parent in law came. I would really like Muq to accompany me that night, but there were rules there: in shared room, no man is allowed to spend the night unless both patients agreed to have their respective husbands to stay. Since the lady’s hubby have gone home and she was sleeping, I had no choice but to let Muq went home and my mom stayed with me, instead. However, turned out that the lady’s hubby came back around 1am, bringing food for her and chit chatting the night away. Unfair!!! I want my husband, too! Kesian dekat mak kena tidur kat kusi tu. Dahlah she’s unwell.
Oh, back to thanking visitors, Azza & Linda plus Awal came to visit. Pak Ndak and Kak Na came. Some of Muq’s relative also came to visit. Kak Su from MMU came. Kak Gee also dropped by! Thank you all for coming.. Sorry if I missed anyone - I’m typing quickly, Lana is waking up tu haaa.
p/s: It’s a wonder lah, I usually cry easily if I’m hurt. Sakit sikit je, nangis lebih. but during the labour, I hardly had any tears, though the pain were .. ah, speechless. Allah knows better, I guess. Who knows, if I was crying then, I might not be able to go through it. But, Sayang, thanks!! I know my husband loves me. Bie, you can add that up in your-only-moments of crying-list. *wink*
Will upload pics of baby later. Lana’s crying already..
