"I miss you fah. N i find myself wif tears in my eyes. Though i dont say it much, but always rmbr dat dada loves u n here 4 u k"
That is something I REALLY need. Thank you, dada..I need a reminder that someone loves me. I need that in time like this.
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I have promised that I won’t tell anyone. I won’t.
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Kak Gee just called. Telling me about her success at work. It’s her prime time. Her first year in the organisation has been very challenging and I know she worked hard for it. So it’s time to enjoy the fruits of her efforts, now. Good for her. That is just Kak Gee. She called me when she’s sad, she called me when she’s happy. She shared almost everything with me. But I just can’t bring msyelf to do the same. When she asked me, how’s my life. I said not good. But I didn’t elaborate. I don’t feel like elaborating. Today is her day. Let her be happy.
I shouldn’t be complaining about my life. So, I am only going to make a statement, in a form of a prayer - Whatever it is, please let me go through this and help me in making the best decision for me, for the people I love.
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26 days and counting ~~~
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"Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never break free"
Dr Ng said something about our Thought Diary today. It was this one statement that triggered it : We tend to elaborate more and report in detail negative things rather than a positive one (more likely sounds like that la). "Have you notice that in your thought diary, there are more negative incidents than positive ones?" Which is very true. The moment I printed it last week, I have noticed that I wrote more negative events rather than a positive ones.
Here I am talking about my so-called life philoshopy "see the silver lining" and yet still focusing on the dark heavy clouds that are hovering above my head.
And today, while I was driving to class, I promised myself to do my reading. The more I attend the class, the more I realized that I am so darn stupid. Hehe. OK. Enuff of putting yourself down, girl.
And I also promised myself to brace myself. I can’t fall apart now. Someone will be needing my 200% support - I’m giving my all to you, I will walk beside you through thick and thin. I am here.
